Teetotal in Sri Lanka - not quite

Anyone who reads this blog will know that I was trying to stop drinking alcohol altogether in the 3 weeks leading up to my holiday. I thought summer recess when I had a bit more time to meet up with friends would be my tricky time and there would be lots of pressure from friends to "just have one". I was wrong. I had very little time to socialise because on top of work, there's a by election in my constituency. But to be fair to my friends, whenever I was out with them, nobody cared if I drank or not. I'm going to try again in September when parliament is in full swing. That's when there are many many receptions, lots of free alcohol around and lots of cajoling to "just have one". What I did discover in my 3 weeks was that if anyone was whispering those 3 little words to me, it was me. I'm glad I didn't find it hard to resist but we'll see how we get on in September.

I also said I would be posting about my cousin, who constantly inspires me in the alcohol story. I didn't do it before I left and I'm not doing it from an internet cafe in Sri Lanka because it deserves more attention than that. Her story is a very interesting one and worth devoting some time to. She has agreed that she will then post from her point of view and I know when she stopped drinking, she faced a lot of peer pressure to "have one".

Having come on holiday I've done as I said I would and started drinking again. I had a gin and tonic on the flight over and I have to say I remembered the attraction as soon as I took a sip - the warmth that spreads over your body, the total relaxation and that feeling of putting all your troubles behind you. The latter was probably more to do with actually getting on the flight but the psychological pulling power of alcohol is so strong that when you are drinking you associate all good feelings with the actual alcohol.

Anyway since then, I've had a few beers and I was dying to get an arak and ginger beer - but again, like the egg roti, like the Sri Lankan curry, it was more to do with the association in my mind. Arak and ginger beer was drunk at a time when I was having a fantastic time in Sri Lanka and all the memories come back. But to be completely honest, it is all losing its alure for me. The alcohol that is. I'm thinking now that it just "ain't all that" and I'm wondering if I COULD happily do without it ever again. Perhaps the real test (apart from being back in parliament) would be to not drink on holiday or not drink at my friend's wedding in August. That last one could be a real test. A big group of my mates will be there. A friend from Ireland is coming over. We're all staying the night. How would my enjoyment of the night be any different if I drank orange juice all night? I went to my friend Sid's wedding last week at the Central Mosque in Glasgow and that was obviously alcohol free. It was great and a relief not to be "Drunk".

Last thought - as I'm writing this I'm realising how lucky I am to be able to navel gaze about all of this. Not everyone can. The cousin I am going to write about is a teetotal alcoholic. She can't pick and choose which events to be teetotal at and which to drink at. I'm aware of that and my intention with all of this has never been to suggest that I face anything like the same pressures. I know I don't. But I do believe none of us are immune to addiction and so the higher our self awareness the better. I wonder if she finds it frustrating reading me prattling on about "I'll just have one at this event but none at that one". I hope not. We'll find out soon enough when she writes for this blog.

Indygal Goes Teetotal

Recently I've become a bit sickened by alcohol. That's partly because of reports that I'm reading, partly because of the alcoholics (recovering and otherwise) I'm coming in contact with but mainly because of the many events I've been attending where the alcohol is flowing freely.

I've been thinking a lot about our attitude to alcohol and the attachment we seem to have to it in Scotland. A friend was visiting from Berlin recently and she felt that the social pressure to drink was very strong in both Scotland and England.

I've also been thinking of late of the people I've loved and lost who I've no doubt would still be here had they not drank so heavily. Some of them didn't even make it to 50.

Sadly, I can do nothing to change that but I can do something for myself and, as an MSP now, I am in a position to do something about this country's relationship with alcohol. When I mention doing "something for myself" interestingly I feel the need to quickly point out that I don't have a drink problem and I never will have. But think about it. If I asked you to drink no alcohol for a month, how would you react? I asked some friends yesterday and they looked like they might cry. None of them have obvious drink problems but they all admitted they would find it extremely hard. The line between social drinking and alcoholism is indeed a thin one.

And if these social drinkers were so dismayed at the thought of only a month without alcohol, how much harder must it be then for the alcoholic who is physically and psychologically addicted? Thinking about that now I have nothing but admiration for those alcoholics who do manage to stay sober.

Anyway, when I asked MYSELF the question, could I stop drinking for a month, the answer was that yes I think I could but I really don't want to. Why? Well mainly because I don't think my friends will like it. And that, I think, is the crux of the problem for many people - it's the social pressure to drink that stops us stopping.

So, I'm going to try. As of today I'm going to attempt not to drink alcohol until I go on holiday on 25th July. I am not planning to suddenly get plastered on 25th btw - I may not drink at all on holiday but the important test for me is how I get on with my day to day life without alcohol. On that I will blog as often as the question of alcohol arises.

I don't mean this to be a gimmick and I hope nobody takes it like that. I genuinely want to examine what kind of pressures (internal and external) are put upon people who don't want to drink alcohol. I have a lot of friends and family. They're all intelligent, articulate, sensible people who are, no doubt, also concerned about the alcohol problem in Scotland. But I imagine some of them will try to cajole me into drinking alcohol. And I have to be honest and say if the tables were turned, I can't guarantee I wouldn't do the same to them because that's what we do in this part of the world. BTW in case any friends are worried, I won't name and shame you :-)

So, we'll see how it goes. I will try to drink no alcohol between now and 25 July. Only 3 weeks I realise but it's the summer, recess doesn't mean not working but it does mean I'm in Glasgow most of the time and so I'll be catching up with friends over lunch and dinner. It will be interesting to see if my friend from Berlin is correct about the pressure to drink in Scotland.

Another friend in Glasgow is teetotal and tells me when he tells people that they invariably respond by telling him "that's okay". There's something not quite right about people feeling they have to "reassure" someone who's just "confessed" to not drinking alcohol. I wonder what response I'll get.

First challenge ~ I'm worrying about Sunday night when I am going out with a friend who I expect will not be happy to hear about my new teetotal status. He's expecting a fun night out and I'll just have to show him (and myself) that it can be done sober! Wish me luck!