My sat nav tried to kill me

I drove through to parliament today and used my sat nav for only the 4th time. In fact, I was driving round in May getting lost as per usual when I thought to myself "I must get a sat nav" which jolted me into remembering that my mum had bought me one for my birthday in March! I'd completely forgotten about it. Blame the job.

Anyway I used it today and it tried to kill me! At first she was just trying to annoy me. She'd say "at the roundabout take the first exit" and I wouldn't, mainly because there was NO roundabout. She was not happy. "Recalculate, recalculate" was the war cry. I pointed out to her that she wouldn't have to do that if she didn't give duff directions in the first place.

So, I'm driving down a road in the city centre when she says "in 100 yards, turn right" AS I am passing a right turn which, when I look, I discover is the turning I should have taken only it arrived 99 yards early! It's too late to turn so I carry on and she's back to her "recalculate" nonsense except this time I SWEAR I heard an attitude in her voice! Next thing I know, as I'm heading over North Bridge, she starts going:

"turn right, turn right, right now turn right"!

That'll be a right turn into a freefall onto the railway tracks below will it? I don't think so! But it just goes to show that you really ought not to trust anyone these days if even your sat nav is trying to kill you! So be warned! Do some thinking for yourself and whatever you do, don't let me give you a lift!